I was doing the backpacking thing around India when a young 'un, when I happened to catch a severe stomach bug that had me laid up in bed for a while. I was staying in a delapidated old hotel at the time.
Due to a dodgy curry somewhere along the line, the only thing I could do for about 5 days was crawl to the toilet and shit poo juice into the bowl.
One day I started to feel a little better, and attempted a walk down the corridor outside my room. I was doing quite well until I got to the end and realised that I had about 5 seconds until my next unstoppable anal eruption.
I leapt into what appeared to be a cupboard, and - much to my shame - spattered all over the floor.
Feeling much better later that day, I managed to get as far as reception, only to be met with the sight of several perplexed engineers. They had been called to fix the air conditioning. For some reason something foul smelling had got into the system, and an evil smell had dispersed throughout the whole hotel.
Can I take this opportunity to extend my heartfelt apologies to the Jodhpur Inn.
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